Between that and watching reruns of Hogan's Heroes, somehow my brain set me as a prisoner in a Nazi camp. I returned to these pages so many times that my simple red journal falls open to the page when I open it. I continued the dream with the guard in the fantasy falling in love with me, sneaking me out, and raising a family with me. Then abruptly my journal entry switches to addressing God. I beg his forgiveness for my sinful thoughts.Lord, why do you torture me—I ask in the lord’s prayer ‘and deliver us not into temptation, deliver us from evil’ it says plainly. Why do I enjoy these dreams?In my little red journal I wrote a lot about sex, a lot about God, and very little about my real life. Real relationships seemed impossible.Everyone knew me as the prim and proper girl who liked learning. Even among the nerd boys, I seemed an off limits alien. At one point, I shared chemistry class with five of them from my core friends group. They made naughty jokes and seemed genuinely. .” Alicia paused and ran her fingers through her golden tresses. “Is it lonely?” Thakkor leaned back in his chair. “Can be at times. Even when there’s other people around, you’re alone, sometimes. You don’t always hook up with men who enjoy comradery.” He sighed and added, “Wasn’t all that lonely with Fantil. His bunch always has a story to tell. I’m gonna miss that.” “Perhaps he’ll take you back, if I explain what happened.” “Maybe, if he’s even around.” Alicia yawned, unable to hold it back in her weariness. “We should probably get some rest. We still have a few days walk ahead of us.” Alicia nodded, the thought of bed once again sending her sexual desire to a new peak. She couldn’t believe her own words when Thakkor reached for some of the blankets to make a pallet on the floor. “The bed is more than large enough to share.” Thakkor shook his head. “I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” “Nor I, you. I cannot bear the thought of forcing you to sleep on the ground, after all.
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